Why You Should Ditch Resolutions and Set Intentions This New Year.

As the New Year begins, many of us feel the pressure to set resolutions—a list of grandiose promises meant to usher in a “new and improved” version of ourselves. Yet, year after year, studies show that most resolutions fail within the first few weeks of January. Why is that? Often, it’s because resolutions are rigid, perfectionistic, and rooted in self-criticism.

This year, I invite you to leave resolutions behind and embrace the power of setting intentions instead. Intentions focus on growth, connection, and self-compassion, creating space for meaningful and sustainable change.

The Problem with Resolutions

Resolutions are often about fixing perceived flaws. Common ones like “lose weight,” “save money,” or “exercise daily” tend to focus on external outcomes rather than the internal journey. They can feel punitive, leaving little room for flexibility or forgiveness when life inevitably throws us a curveball.

Moreover, resolutions often lack emotional depth or personal significance, which can make them feel like a chore rather than an inspiring pursuit.

What Are Intentions?

Intentions shift the focus from a rigid goal to the way you want to feel and grow. They’re rooted in values and are about the journey, not just the destination. For example:

• Instead of “I will lose 20 pounds,” an intention might be, “I want to feel more connected to my body and nourish it with care.”

• Instead of “I will save $10,000,” an intention might be, “I want to cultivate a sense of financial security and mindfulness in my spending.”

Intentions prioritize self-compassion and encourage curiosity over judgment.

How to Set Meaningful Intentions

1. Reflect on Your Values: What truly matters to you? Family? Growth? Peace? Let these guide your intentions.

2. Focus on the Feeling: How do you want to feel this year—connected, calm, inspired? Use those feelings as your compass.

3. Keep It Flexible: Intentions evolve with you. Revisit them regularly and adjust as needed.

4. Celebrate Small Wins: Intentions are about progress, not perfection. Recognize and honor your efforts along the way.

This New Year, give yourself the gift of intention. It’s a kinder, more compassionate way to create meaningful changes in your life and relationships. Let go of the pressure to be perfect and embrace the idea that growth is a journey.

By focusing on how you want to be rather than what you want to achieve, you set the stage for a year filled with connection, purpose, and self-compassion. Isn’t that what the New Year should truly be about?

Ready to set intentions that nurture your relationships? Therapy can help! Contact me to explore how therapy can support your personal and relational goals in 2025.